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Crotched Top
Grabbing Your Crotch (Growing Up Smart Bad Habit #4)
Grabbing your crotch is the overt act of holding, stroking, patting, scratching, massaging, or otherwise touching your genitals in public. There are many reasons to touch your genitalia, otherwise known as your package. There are matters of necessity, like scratching a pesky itch or rearranging your package if it’s tangled in your underwear. There are also matters of choice. These are when men handle their package because they believe it makes them look good or because it feels good. In some countries, handling your package brings you good luck. Or so those who do it say.
There are two ways to grab your crotch: inside or outside your pants. Most baseball players and entertainers, especially rap singers, favor the outside technique. If you want to be noticed, outside is the best way of handling things, so to speak. It’s hard to do a good job scratching, though, when it’s done through a steel-cupped athletic supporter and several layers of clothing. This leads us to conjecture that outside maneuvers are mostly for titillation and show, kind of like a cock rooster fretting and strutting about with his chest feathers puffed out.
Inside manipulation, on the other hand, is a more intimate act carried out in the virtual privacy of your pants. Your options for an inside maneuver are to go over the top, up the leg (works okay with shorts), or, if discretion is called for, through the pocket (also called pocket pool). Playing good pocket pool is an art in and of itself. How well you play depends on how tight your pants are, the size and design of your pockets, the thickness of the material, and whether or not you are lucky enough to have a hole in one or both the pockets.
This brings us to Italy. Apparently, grabbing your crotch has been outlawed there. Italy’s Court of Appeal has issued a "hands-off" ruling which threatens to arrest and fine hapless male citizens caught doing a crotch grab for any reason. The courts have spoken, saying, “The touching of genitalia in public is a sign of ill manners and must be considered against public decency.” This turn of events is all the more reason to play pocket pool while in Italy.
So there you have it. Some consider crotch grabbing a harmless and instinctive reflex. Others are repulsed by it in any form. Individual feelings aside, it’s clear that society generally considers such public displays unacceptable even though it’s tolerated—even expected—by some professional athletes and entertainment persona, among others. Given all this conflicting information, here are some ideas to help you through the social minefield surrounding crotch grabs.
Crotch Grabbing Dos and Don’ts
(For Regular Joe’s)
- Think of crotch grabs as a private matter. Handle them accordingly.
- Wash your hands after inside grabs.
- Don’t shake hands or serve food right after a grab.
- Stay calm if you absolutely have to perform a grab. Assess your surroundings. Are you in a dark movie theater or at the dinner table? Take the appropriate action.
Crotch Grabbing Dos and Don’ts
(For Professional Athletes and Entertainers)
- Go for it.
About the Author
Frank Hawkins is a co-founder of Boy’s Guide Books. Together with his partners, he writes and publishes "how to" information for children and teens. Frank and the BGB team, consisting of doctors, teachers, fitness experts, nutritionists, athletes, and parents, are dedicated to helping young men and women grow up healthy and wise. Visit our web site at http://boysguidebooks.com.
dont read if easily offended! funny or not?
36 inch FF breasts, covered in warm Belgium chocolate.....
1 inch erect nipples topped with devon double whipped cream....
clean shaven min-e framed by an open crotched leather thong......
moist salty cli- smothered it top quality blackberry jam....
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Yes, funny. Wife thought so too
Rhaka Kahn Crotched On Top Rope